Behind the Words: Faith
Karen Thatcher
Disclaimer: This is not designed to “convert” anyone, it’s not designed to force faith upon you. This is my personal experience with faith, and how it relates to my own life, especially in the midst of challenges.
“…so i’ve been pondering what faith is, and what it means to hold on to faith when surrounded by drama and pain…”
Throughout the years, and especially since i’ve been chronically ill, I have often been asked the question “How do you keep your faith in amongst it all?”
The past few years especially have been a rough ride personally for me- physical illness, grief and loss, a lot of sadness, and a lot of health challenges and worries. And so i’ve been pondering what faith is, and what it means to hold on to faith when surrounded by drama and pain. Where to find God in it, how to SEE God in it, how to squash the guilt and shame of not being good enough or faith filled enough… especially in those moments when energy (physical and emotional) are low.
“I wanted to be honest about both sides of how faith is for me.”
When we talk about faith, we’re very quick to tell the good and the nice sides of it. And YES, God is good. YES, He is kind. YES, faith is incredible. But it’s not automatically easy or filled with a never ending supply of happiness. (Joy and happiness are two very different things.) I wanted to be honest about both sides of how faith is for me. The incredible gift that faith in God is, but also that more often than not, it’s a (sub)conscious choice, more than a feeling. That some days it feels almost non-existent, or floating in the background because I don’t have the capacity to engage in it any more than that.
If you are someone who has been in church a long time (or someone who has had faith for a long time), you may know the weight of expectations. The weight of not feelings good enough or “Christian” enough. As humans, we’re very quick to compare ourselves, and that goes for faith too. I often look at people who I categorise as having much better faith than I do, and think “why can’t I be as faith filled as they are? I must not be DOING enough.” and I forget that faith is not a point system. I also forget that what we see on the surface, more often than not, is not the whole story of what’s going on behind the scenes.
We all are much more than it seems from the outside, we all have our struggles; our storms; our pains and our sadnesses. And how we cling to faith in the midst of that is a very personal thing.
“Faith is not following a set path, it’s not a rule book with an exam that you have to pass, it’s a relationship with a trust that will last....”
I most definitely do not have it all figured out…. But I wrote these words, for me and for you. But I want you to remember that how my faith looks, may be totally different to how yours does. And that’s ok. God created us (by design) to be different people with different personalities. Often the world and religion tell us that we have to fit into a box, that we have to do things in one specific way to be right… but that’s not faith…
Faith is not following a set path, it’s not a rule book with an exam that you have to pass, it’s a relationship with a trust that will last….
“God is no less present, and no less worthy of your faith in the times when you can’t... bring yourself to be visibly and actively, outrageously faith filled. ”
I absolutely 100% advocate for pushing into your faith, trying to grow it, and step out into it. Reading the bible, praying, asking God to reveal more to you. I fully advocate for actively increasing your faith when you can. But God is no less present, and no less worthy of your faith in the times when you can’t do that. God is a kind papa, who knows you and loves you for WHO you are, even in the moments when you can’t bring yourself (for WHATEVER REASON) to be visibly and actively, outrageously faith filled.
“Faith is NOT a feeling, it’s a decision you make, and sometimes that means making that decision every…single…day. Anything else is a bonus.”
If you are struggling with faith, or if you want to know more about Christian faith in general and are exploring, do reach out, i’d love to chat to you and tell you more.
